The Uprising

As some of you already know, I’ve recently moved from St. Louis back to my parents home. I’m staying here with them until I get more settled and can figure out where the best place is to live here in town. Recently my parents made a purchase and I don’t know quite how to feel about it.

One morning I got up after a cycle of REM sleep to flip the light on and hear “Pffft”. Now, I had heard this the night before, knew what it was and it didn’t scare me but there was just something about it I didn’t like. When I encountered this thing the next morning, I was lucky to have my eyes half-open otherwise I would have been blinded. This has become my most recent fear. Fear of being blinded by an automated air freshener.

This is roughly what the air freshener looks like.

The first night was hard to get used to hearing it go off in the night in the bathroom. Every so many minutes I would hear “Pfft.” I think it was on “Gerd” setting so it would just go off at random times. In fact I think I had dreams with the word “Pfft” in it that night.

Then as per usual fair when matters like this have arisen, I started to get paranoid. This thing was not only going off when turning on the light but it was also sensing when someone was in the room with the light off…and going off at random times.

Then, “it” happened.

One evening I was feeding my cat in a completely separate room and again I hear, “Pffft.” My cat jumped, I jumped and realized these things are getting smarter. They’ve multiplied and started setting up shop in other rooms. Soon I worry the house is going to be a series of Indiana Jones-like booby traps and I will run from room to room while trying to hold my full bladder and dodging the spray mist of smelly alcohol. I worry there will be an air-freshener uprising and soon my family and I will be held captive by them.

However there is a bright side…the room will smell nice.

What modern contraption do you like and loathe at the same time? What modern-day house-hold contraption can you not live without?


21 thoughts on “The Uprising

  1. I would say the computer and/or my smartphone. I love them, but I hate them as well. They distract me from life. UGH.

    • I hear you on that one sister! When you use a smart phone everyday they serve as a distraction, but when we need them say during a power outage or a cable outage, they are wonderful!

      Definitely couldn’t live without either of those things! LOL! Which if you absolutely had to go without would you choose? The phone or the computer? 🙂

  2. LOL that was brilliant. By the way I am as anti-tech-savvy as one can imagine, and I believe electronic stuff does get a hint of my nervousness, when I come under their close surveillance vicinity, like dogs do sometimes. They definitely behave in uncanny ways with me. The best till date has been when I entered my friend’s office and his hard disk caught fire (I kid you not)…good luck with your room freshener(s).

    • Oh MY GOSH! His hard disk caught fire? Maybe the machines are picking up on you and your nervousness! Sounds like you have one heck of a story there! Ha ha ha! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and sharing your story! Ha ha ha!!! 😀

  3. Love your blog! Read it because of the freshly pressed post about old notes from school days (Congratulations). This article about the ominous pfft sound made me laugh out loud! Very cute. You remind me of my daughter – she’s kinda quirky too – and of course I love her!

  4. HA!! This made me laugh. Love the picture and the pfft sound in your dreams. I’ve always wondered about those automated air fresheners…I think I’ll stay away from them now that I’ve heard your story. 🙂

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