Diary of an angsty girl

As some of you may have noticed, I haven’t written in a while.  This is partially due to adjusting to a new job position, taking in two roommates temporarily at two different times, thyroid issues, and a major bout of depression from weaning off Bupropion while dealing with the thyroid issues.

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It seems like since 2015 I’ve been giving more of myself and concentrating on others rather than being selfish and doing things strictly just for me.  I love doing things for others, don’t get me wrong, but at some point it would be nice to refuel the tank so I can turn around and give more kindness and encouragement out to others.

Since the tank is empty, this has caused me to think outwardly outrageous things.  Here are a few examples.

“Just because I’m overly helpful is no reason for you to passively aggressively allude to having raging diarrhea. Asking where the Imodium is, isn’t enough to get me to leave you alone.”

“Why are you still wearing your high school jacket 22 years later?  Only The Beach Boys get to do that.”

“Coming in with your music blaring from a battered blue tooth speaker hanging from your belt loop isn’t a good idea.  Especially when curse words are involved.  This is a family establishment.  Also telling your significant other, ‘You sound white’…is like saying you’ve suddenly realized something you hadn’t noticed about them. I think he knows. Maybe turn off the music and communicate more.”

“Yes, I AM on my knees.  Why do you act surprised?  That’s the only way I can reach the shelf! #tallpeopleproblems” “I’m on my knees?  Noooooo, I thought I was a pirate without peg-legs!”  “Yes I’m on my knees.  You’re old.  I thought we were just making obvious statements.”

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Those are just things that happened at work.  Here are some things that happened at home.

“Whose underwear are these, and why are they out where the squirrels have access to them? Are the squirrels the cause of the person losing their underwear?”

“Why is there blood dripped on the sidewalk where we exit the steps?  Can’t they bludgeon each other indoors?”

“Why is there a guy shouting ‘Let me in!’ at 1 am?  If he wasn’t such a dog, maybe he wouldn’t have been let out with the other two. Guess that finally answers the question, ‘Who let the dogs out’.”

“Why are all the dogs barking suddenly while I’m trying to pray and meditate? (Dogs suddenly stop barking) My prayers worked!” (Cats starts rustling bags) “Dang it!”

This is only a small sampling, and yes, I get that they may not be all that bad.  However, for me they are.  Thank you for being patient with me while I’m working my way out of a 6 month funk. To family and friends who I’ve seen in this length of time, if I seem a bit stand-offish, it isn’t you, it genuinely is me.

What are some thoughts you have had that you wouldn’t normally say in your everyday life?  Were they due to depression or lack of sleep or both?

 

Gross Domestic Happiness

My husband and I are moving.  We are packing up the cats as we speak and teaching them how to meow in Dzongkha and Japanese.

In a former blog post I mentioned one of the five things people didn’t know about me is I wanted an assignment where I would travel and write about the destinations I’ve visited.  Obviously on this trip my husband would accompany me to help document our activities.  He is a professional photographer and the last time I took a picture I looked like this:

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Granted this all sounds very much like “Eat, Pray, Love” but it would be quirkier, I’m traveling WITH my husband and not starting out single.  Call it a “Couple’s Quest for Intrinsic Happiness”.

The truth is we aren’t really moving.  We recently watched a documentary titled, “Happy” on Netflix.happy PosterThe entire film was fascinating and a couple of things stood out to me.  Half way through the film the crew went to Bhutan and talked about the main concern of the country being “Gross National Happiness”.  Whereas most countries concentrate on the amount of money they’re bringing in, what exports they can sell to who, and how to turn the income from the sale into goods for themselves, Bhutan realized what was truly important, their people.

The nation as a collective has decided not to concentrate on material concerns.  The material concerns caused them to move established communities, upheaving a life they once knew, eliminate forestry cover and lose spiritual sites for a time.  Gross National Product in turn was causing more harm than good so instead, they decided to pursue Gross National Happiness.  Going into it they knew they wouldn’t be a nation of monetary wealth.  They have only just started this endeavor and we have yet to see what comes of their pursuits.  They believe the happiness of their people in turn will be rewarding, helping them lead prosperous, longer lives.

(It is a proven fact, the happier a person is and the people around them, the longer they live.)

This brings me to the next country we would like to move to, Japan.  There are two reasons I would love to visit the island of Okinawa.  The Okinawans have the longest living population in the world, most live to be one hundred years old.  They farm together, eat dinner together and through the farming, provide gifts of food for their family and friends.  This sounds like a dream to me, this is my first reason for visiting the beautiful island.

They interviewed elderly women at a local community center and the women spoke of “ichariboachode” (you are brother and sister even if you have met for the first time) and “monchu” (one family).  Some of the women were captives in World War II.  When they lost their families, they had their neighbors and communities to rely on.  Everyone took care of each other.

My Grandfather was in the 6th Marine Division during World War II, went to Okinawa and helped rescue some of these women from the caves they were hidden in on the island.  My Grandfather barely spoke of this, his heart was broken over the condition in which he found these women and children.  When I spoke to my parents about this film my mother said some resonating words, “Your Grandpa would be so happy that in time these people found happiness.” She is right.  This is the second reason I would love to visit Okinawa.  In some way, by visiting, I feel it would bring closure to an issue my Grandfather had for a long time.  By seeing with my own eyes, their happiness, and in turn letting them know he carried that burden with him for so long, it would be a meeting of happiness and healing for the parties involved.

My Grandfather in China circa1945

My Grandfather in China circa1945

My Grandfather on a tug boat Circa 1943-1945 (?)

My Grandfather on a tug boat Circa 1943-1945 (?)

For one nation to realize the meaning of life is not in the possession of things but within ourselves, faith and each other is a huge step, I feel, in the right direction.  I want to go with my husband to Bhutan and maybe accidentally get stuck between two prayer wheels, so I can say “It’s alright, I’m between prayers right now!”.  I want to explore what makes the people of Bhutan happy and how they plan to ensure happiness for future generations.

I want to go to Okinawa and speak to some of the women who may have met my Grandpa. I want to ask them how through the sorrows of war they made the journey back to happiness.

I want to travel to the places I only heard my grandpa speak of and where my great-aunt would bring back souvenirs like a tiny bronze Buddha statue.  Even though both my grandpa and great-aunt were devout Christians, they still saw the beauty in other peoples’ faiths and cultures.  I want to see what they saw.

I want to see, understand and live happiness like the people in these countries.  Maybe in turn if someone were to employ my husband and I to travel to these places, in writing the book about the experiences, it would help others to look within, reflect and see what their passion truly is, what truly makes them happy.

 If any of my readers are from Bhutan or Okinawa I would like to know what you think about the representation of your countries in the documentary.  Do you feel it is accurate?  Do you feel you are intrinsically happy or are you still seeking it?

     To my other readers, what makes YOU happy? Happy 

 

 

10 Books

Recently I was challenged by a friend to list the top 10 books that have had a major impact on my life.  Because I’m a verbose person and take challenges seriously, I couldn’t just answer his request with a few blanketed answers. Here they are in no particular order with their explanations:

     The Outsiders is a book you get something out of at different stages of your life.  Recently for a class we re-read the classic, it was mind blowing to find out it was written by a 16 year old.  

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     Eat Pray Love.  This is a great book for any one who has ever experienced divorce and tried to make sense of it.  This book made me want to travel, get lost, make new friends and then write about it.  It taught me how to put some of my past behind me and work though some life lessons.

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     If you ever want to impress a literature professor, drop the name Rex Stout.  When I finally resided alone in my apartment in St. Louis I knew I would be restless at night. The answer to listlessness was found in a fabulous mystery The Sound of Murder.  It was originally written in the early 40’s at the dawn of industrial espionage.  With quirky characters and a foresight of an upcoming industry in a new material called plastic, the setting Mr. Stout paints in so surreal yet believable.

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     The first book I remember falling in love with is, I Mean It Stanley.  This is the book my parents started reading to me and by the age of two, I had it memorized page for page.  Every night I asked them to read it to me before bed, each word drilling it’s way into my brain.  When my Grandparents came down for a visit, my Parents suggested to my Grandma she should read me a book that night.  So I retrieved this book, sat in her lap and as she turned the pages I started reciting the text.  My Grandmother was a lot like me, she was a former teacher and had a sense of wonder.  She thought I was reading the book.  She didn’t know my parents tirelessly read this to get me in the habit of a sleep routine.  She looked in amazement at my parents thinking I might be a genius.  Then my Dad cracked a smile and the gig was up.

And I Mean It Stanley

     Everyone needs a good Doctor in their life.  Mine had the last name of Seuss.  My first grade teacher asked everyone in class to pick their favorite book to bring to class and read.  I poured over my selection at home. It was between Fox in Socks and 101 Dalmatians.  In the end I chose Fox in Socks, mainly because in the beginning of the book, Dr. Seuss goads the reader with this graphic:  Fox in Socks     How could you resist?  At the young age of six I wasn’t willing to back down from a challenge and for once settled who won the tweedle beetle battle with paddles on poodles eating noodles.

     If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What am I doing in the Pits? This book I read because it had been sitting in the drawer of my Parents’ end tables and was begging to be read.  The cover wreaked of late 70’s artwork and humor.  I was 17 when I first picked it up, read it on a Journalism class trip to Chicago and for the first time in a long time was caught laughing out loud to a joke no one could hear.  This book appealed to me because I felt displaced, and Erma Bombeck made sense of everything.  Life is a bowl of cherries

Batman a Death in the Family was my first experience with a gritty plot only capable of taking place in between the pages of (at the time) my favorite Super Hero’s life.  Little did I know in comic books characters can perish at the hand of a madman armed with a crow bar.  Until then I was only exposed to characters who died of natural causes.  This may have been when I learned the word bludgeoned250px-Batman_Death_In_The_Family_TPB_cover

     Any Archie comic EVER.  In the 80‘s and early 90‘s Archie was all I ever read during the summer, sometimes in between Garfield books I checked out at the library.  I devoured these wishing I could be Betty Cooper. Unfortunately, one of my best friends growing up had blonde hair, where I learned the ugly truth, only she could be Betty because she had the correct hair color.  These books taught me blondes had more fun and brunettes were snooty, confusing my idea of what a woman should be.  Eventually along the way I realized these were just characters and nobody should have to be compartmentalized into either image.  Instead I developed a crush on Jughead and a love for art by trying to re-draw the images.  Archie comics also helped to forge the way for me in a literary sense.  The featured cover below is the one they published an interview I did of my Aunt. Archie Comic

     When my parents realized comic books were no longer just a hobby but something that could cause my two loves to collide they wanted to help.  They purchased two books by Will Eisner in which he states the best scenario for comic book writing is when the artist and the writer are the same person.  If this isn’t the case, he goes on to illustrate what can happen when people get their ideas mixed up.  Even if you aren’t into comics, it’s a wonderful book explaining the process with beautiful illustrations.Will Eisner

     The next book is something everyone needs to read to understand how to become a better writer, even if it only pertains to correspondence.  The Groucho Letters is a book of letters exchanged between Groucho Marx, some of his colleagues and son.  This was a gem I discovered at my parents house.  It probably belonged to my Grandma and one of my Aunts at one point.  One specific part in the book stuck out to me.  Groucho had built a rapport with a fellow funny person who was at the time living in Maine.  By the third letter of catching up, the friend wrote to Groucho, “The town is so boring the tide went out and never came back.”  This book goes to show how friendship can bring you unexpected things, like the gift of laughter or witty writing.

Groucho Letters

     To my friend, hopefully this answers your challenge. To my readers…what are some of your favorite books and which ones have influenced you the most?

 

One Lovely Blog Award (part Deux)

Thanks to Sherry at The Lunch Lady blog for awarding me with the One Lovely Blog Award!  Everyone should head over to her blog right now for some inspiration.  She is a tea connoisseur, a whiz with refurbishing, and a wonderful blogger! one-blog-lovely-award

As part of accepting this award, I must tell you all seven things about me, some you might possibly not know.  Here they are in no particular order:

1.  I want to travel to unique places in the world and get paid to write about my travels.  I feel like I live under a rock sometimes because I don’t get out enough.  There are special parks locally and I wonder why I’ve never heard of, or been to these places.  Apparently there is a large “cat” sanctuary in Arkansas.  You can stay in cabins on the premises and hear the Lions speak to each other across the park in low, thundering trills as you wake in the morning.

2.  I really enjoy reading and writing short stories.  Inevitably, you have to do a lot of editing, but strangely, short story writing gives you freedom to get right in to the nitty-gritty of the plot.  My particular emphasis is on character development, you may not relate to the characters, but there is just something about them that appeals to the reader.  Let’s just say, I love writing so much, I aced my creative writing course!  Not to brag or anything.

3.  I’ve tweeted back and forth with the real life Wonder Woman, Linda Carter.  On several occasions.  Again, not to brag or anything.

4.  I collect the tops of Honest Tea bottles and the tags from Yogi Tea bags.  Somehow I think one day I will have time to do an art project inlaying the bottle caps on a table top where-in I pour acrylic over them to preserve the well written six-word essays inscribed in the bottle caps.  I also think one day I will have time to make jewelry out of the tea bag tags.  This has been two years in the making.

5.  I’m still catching up on the classics of literature.  This summer I read The Great Gatsby for the first time and loved it.  Any given day I might be reading 3 books at the same time.  Currently I’m reading Tracks, The Kinetic Keeper (a book by my cousin), An Autobiography of a Yogi, and soon I will be reading To Kill a Mockingbird.

6.  I love watching people’s reactions when they taste my food for the first time…especially if I’m proud of it.

7.  I stink at Baby Shower games.  Here is evidence:IMG_0272

Now to continue this on and pay the love forward from Ms. Sherry’s blog, here are the following people I would like to nominate!

O.K. bloggers here are the rules to accept the award…and I look forward to hearing more about YOU!

1. You must thank the person who nominated you and include a link to their blog.

2. You must list the rules and display the award.

3. You must add 7 facts about yourself.

4. You must nominate 15 other bloggers and comment on one of their posts to let them know they have been nominated.

5. You must display the award logo and follow the blogger who nominated you.Unlike the Liebster Award which is aimed at newbie bloggers, this award has no restriction as to who you can nominate!

This teacher publishes comic books successfully.

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The title of this blog is a six word sentence I have chosen for my future. These are the six words, I will bring to fruition. Before making the predicate part of the sentence a reality, first I must become the subject.

Today’s daily post challenge on WordPress is to come up with a six word sentence describing your future.

In recent months I’ve been praying and meditating on what to do about a major life decision. Life has been a bit difficult financially here of late therefore causing me to re-plan my original life blueprint. A lot of people my age are having to reroute their lives as if they are a satellite navigation system in their car.

As you know I majored with a degree in Fine Art. This isn’t exactly the most stable degree, especially in an economy like this one. Having a bit of a dilemma I’ve had conversations with people about my life plan as now it’s not just my life but I share it with my husband.

Curiously my Mother-in-law and I were having a conversation one day when she suddenly said, “Have you thought about teaching…” Honestly years ago I had considered becoming an art teacher but due to unforeseen reasons that plan didn’t work.

I had my heart intent on changing the world one classroom at a time through art, by helping children understand the importance of art. I wanted to teach them it was o.k. to think differently and be in the likes of tortured but wonderful and humorous companions such as Van Gogh and Frida Kahlo. I wanted to teach them to see the world through a kaleidoscope of colors, not just black and white. I wanted to teach them to think and see differently and learn people can speak many languages by communicating through the visual arts.

My Mother-in-law finished her sentence, “…English?” This was the first time anyone had suggested teaching something other than art to me. This was the seed planted in my brain that slowly started sprouting this summer. Suddenly I realized my gift of being able to communicate with children and awkward junior high kids may not be lost. My parents have always seen my gift with children and knew I had something special.

Then the second sign came a few weeks ago. My husband received a call from a best friend. He didn’t tell her everything that had been going through my mind, the questioning, the self doubt about the possibility of teaching something which in essence is my second language; art always has and always will be my first language. She told him over the phone, “She would make a great middle school teacher.”

Then came the third sign, this is the one that has been a constant. My friend of 12 years has said to me numerous times since 2007 I need to bite the bullet and become a teacher. She witnessed my gift first hand when we worked together and I basically babysat children in the fitting room of the store we worked. She even enrolled my help the weekend of her wedding sitting me next to the most talkative children of her family knowing full well we’d be in full on conversation mode before the adults even broke into the festivities. Last week something private happened (which I won’t discuss here) and I texted her about it. My phone buzzed, I quickly looked at it to see my third sign in text form. Her response was, “Become a teacher.”

I couldn’t believe it, three signs. People have always said things come in threes.

I finally sat down and told my parents of my plans a few weeks ago of how I might be going back to school next January. The more I talked about it the more excited I became. As I sat there, I started hatching lesson plans over the belief I would share a common interest with some of my students; comic books.

Comic books were my gateway into becoming a better reader, writer and… artist. What better way to combine three of my loves? Then it came to me to teach my future imaginary students how to write a comic book. Then the plan became more elaborate, why not combine this project with the art students who will help illustrate it for them if they can not illustrate it themselves? Then this lesson plan also integrates communication skills, because as we all know, what the writer and the artist sees are not always the same thing.

The excitement over exploring this lesson plan made me think of another plan, why not publish these books? We could combine all of the books the students made, and then publish them so all students and anyone who wanted to purchase them could. All of the proceeds would then go back into the school’s pockets.

This morning, as I rode in my car, I did my usual prayers. I prayed for my family, my friends, my co-workers. Then I asked God for another sign. This might seem demanding to ask considering I had already received three signs. Basically I said, “Look, I know you’ve sent these signs, but I want to make sure I heard you right. Please if you are sending me a sign, make it to where I know and please help me to listen to you.” I like to be certain of things now in my older age. I’ve grown tired of not looking before I leap, there is too much at stake now to leap without eyes.

I think my response sign came a few hours later at work this morning. My friend was helping a mother and her young daughter at the counter. I was on the other side and happened to see the young girl whose head didn’t even reach the counter. Strangely she reminded me of me in first grade. She had been dressed by her mother but so much of her personality was bursting at the seams it was hard to keep herself in the assumed pristine condition she was dressed in when she left the house. Seeing this bubbly young girl, I made my way over to her and said, “High five!” She was in the middle of eating a morsel of a pear and quickly shoved the pear in her mouth as she exuberantly gave me a high five with the pear residue still on her tiny fingers. She quickly said, “Hang on, I have to wipe the pear off my hands!” Without skipping a beat, with one swipe on her shirt she then quickly slapped my hand as an affirmation of excellence in being true to who you are.

I had to make my way to the back to put something away and then made my way to the computer to print off tags. I heard some commotion on the other side of the restaurant when suddenly I found the little girl standing on the other side of the counter looking at me with her innocent eyes. She said, “Hey you’re really pretty today.” Taken back by her kind words and her uninhibited way of delivering them, I quickly made sure to compliment her on her shoes and outfit, but before I could even get the words out about her outfit she held up her entire leg to show me a different angle of her shoes and exclaimed, ” My Nana got them for me!”

I then asked her, “So have you started school yet?” Her reply, “Weeeelllll YEAH!” As she tried to unfurl her story as fast as she could, her mom told her they were limited on time and would come back. The little girl and I made plans to talk about her school next time she came in with her mom.

A few seconds after they had left I looked across the room to see my friend behind the other counter where she loudly said, “I think you are going to be canonized as the patron saint of children.”

I think this was the gentle sign reminding me of my gift of gab with children. This was just the conversation needed to persuade me the other three signs were a message for me to become a teacher. I already knew I was going to write, draw and publish comic books, I didn’t realize I would be putting on an extra “hat” in the process, but it’s a wonderful feeling.

How do you see your future? What is something that has been calling you but it has taken you a long time to notice? What was your blue print you had planned and what changed it?

P.s. I googled the patron Saint of children and it’s this guy…

20130910-202738.jpg I’ve always thought it would be cool to have his job!

The Daily Prompt: The Inner Light

Everyone starts their blog for a myriad of reasons. A long time ago when everyone communicated through Myspace, I sort of had a blog on there to keep up with friends. Then as we have all become familiar with changing times, the latest fad in social media networking changed and everyone made the leap to Facebook. Unfortunately, the new writing format didn’t appeal to me on Facebook when I signed up in 2006. It would be a while before I returned to writing.

In 2010 I was put in touch with a small publishing company in St. Louis and as part of the requirements for being considered for a novel submission, you had to be a prolific writer on your own blog. The idea of having my own space to write about everything and anything was appealing to me. Eventually my idea for a novel (pitched as a graphic novel at the time) was turned down, but it opened up the door for me to consider myself a writer and develop my craft. I continued writing on the blog, most of it was absurd and a halfway attempt at being funny and witty. Then I went through a divorce and unfortunately the blog was one of the few places I was still attached to my ex. I could no longer blog about my personal life which became the main subject of that particular blog without getting some form of feedback from him or some former associates.

I was careful about the information I posted, censoring myself was new. I yearned to be lyrically free, to be verbose and to spring forth with ideas like I once did. Every story had a hint of being stifled, leaving my readers to read between the lines, some who knew me personally and some who did not, probably causing some confusion.

The second to last blog entry on my old blog was about getting a job back in my hometown and looking forward to the new adventure in an old familiar place I needed to move away from in order to grow up. The blog entry after that; I wrote about my grandfather’s passing. This is where I stopped. My life had taken a sudden turn. The job I had blogged about became a wash forcing me to look for a new job in my second week of being back home and now suddenly my grandfather had passed. It seemed as if my grandfather’s death was the finality of not only the blog, but solidified my life would be completely different. In terms of how to put it, it was the end of my era in St. Louis.

A month or so later one of my best friends passed away from Thyroid cancer. Life had become difficult. I was struggling to not think about family and friends in the life I left behind in the big city, feeling like I was missing out, feeling in a way, sort of alone and like I let them down by not being there for them in their final moments.

The itch to write came back. I wanted to connect with others, but didn’t want as a result to have any contact with my ex and any former cohorts due to me writing about my life. My grandfather and my bestie wouldn’t want me to write in fear. They loved me for my crazy self, the girl who always wore a smile and a flower in her hair. Being in a funk and depressed was not going to get me any closer to finding that woman I was and the woman I wanted to aspire to be in the future.

The solution for me, was to start this blog. Originally, I started out under the pen name Quirky Girl as a way of hiding. The funny thing about this blog, through writing it, I made the decision to make it positive. People talk about the effects of positivity and how it can change and influence your life. Making this decision to write something positive, influenced me to think more positively in my life outside of this blog. I became a tiny bit more social again, I started making friend requests on Facebook, as some of you know; which lead to my marriage to my amazing husband. However, had this blog not been posted to my Facebook, my husband might possibly have never taken an interest in me. As he put it, “When I read your blog I realized there was something going on between the ears.” Being positive lead me to all of this.

I made the conscious decision to write something positive, if being positive wasn’t going to happen the day I happened to be inspired to write, then at least it would be somewhat humorous. More importantly, to combat the loneliness, this blog was also a tool to connect with others and hear their thoughts on topics no matter how ridiculous they were. I was used to only getting a few hits here and there. The whole goal was to be a ghost writer and work the hard way trying to gain a following and gain readers. I liked the idea of famous anonymity. If fellow Missourian Samuel Clemens could write as Mark Twain, then maybe I could accomplish something similar.

Suddenly one day while I was out and about grabbing a sub sandwich I checked my phone to find my blog had blown up. WordPress made my blog a viral hit for a couple of days. I realized I could no longer hide, I couldn’t be afraid of people enjoying what I had to write and the ridiculous adventures that happen. If my ex found out about the new blog, then so what? He’s not going to find out anything new, except I’ve developed a fear of automated air fresheners and have recently been remarried in the last year.

The moral of this story dear readers, is when you have a light, you have to let it shine. You can’t hide it from the rest of the world, this is one thing you have taught me over the last year and I thank you for the lesson. Be you, be bold, be brave, be bright, be love.

Why did you start writing?

20130802-204219.jpg This is me, no longer hiding…HELLO WORLD!

Writer’s constipation becomes artistic diarrhea

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Writer’s block is crippling. It’s one of those things that strikes when you least expect it. Part of the reason why I might be inflicted with this issue is due to the fact life has been happening at such a fast rate, I’m for once managing to not only keep up with it but enjoy it at the same time. However, that doesn’t help for managing to find time to sit and write when you’re busy making life happen.

I’m also going to blame my writers block on my Jungian personality type that can switch and swing one of two ways, ENFJ and ENTJ. Lately I’ve been working on a rotating art project in which you exchange your piece every week with someone and add to what they’ve made. Needless to say, my brain is in visual or “feeling” mode rather than “thinking” mode which might explain the difficulty in verbally expressing or writing my stories here of late on this blog. We are only a week in with this project but still I can’t switch my brain off from thinking of interesting or funny visuals to draw and paint. When this happens, my brain switches over from having verbal abilities and can’t seem to spit anything out; unfortunately for my art partners the only thing my brain spits out is artistic diarrhea.

Because of the recent brain switch over, I’ve been mulling over visual ideas with my coworkers who are doing this project and I’m fairly certain they are getting tired of my strange excitement over being able to flex the muscles on the other side of my brain for once.

Just to give you an example of what has been going through my mind for ideas, I will in my best way verbally describe to you the images I envisioned.

The first idea I had was to have someone eating a plate of spaghetti with the spaghetti being formed into words saying, “You are what you eat.”

I know what you’re thinking; this idea isn’t so bad. No, this idea wasn’t, it was the idea that came after it.

The second idea I had was to have a pirate with an apple on his hook saying, “You ARRR what you eat!” At this point for those of you out there who are still with me and reading this, you might say, ” This isn’t the worst of ideas and I can see how this idea stemmed from the first one.” I would agree with you whole heartedly. It’s the third idea I came up with that would cause you to question the health of my mental state altogether.

You see this project we are working on has to be about food. All of us working on this rotating art project work in an all natural grocery store. Once our team has worked on all four paintings, then we are going to auction them off to raise money for a family in need at Christmas time. So to represent us, and what we promote in our everyday lives, we have to make the subject matter in some form about food.

The third and worst idea came to me while I was working in the frozen section near the dried fruit. It was the idea of where raisins actually come from. Suddenly I remembered when I was a kid going to visit my aunt and my cousin and remembered this was one of the first instances I helped my aunt change my newborn cousin’s diaper. Bear in mind I didn’t have any brothers or sisters despite the fact I begged my parents for one; so I was kind of clueless about babies in general. When I went to help change the diaper and saw my cousin’s belly I couldn’t help but gasp; there was a raisin where her belly button should be. At the time I was highly puzzled by this and my aunt giggled jokingly calling this shriveled dark spot my cousin’s raisin. Then it was explained to me later on this is just the part of the umbilical cord that hasn’t naturally fallen off yet.

When I remembered this story, it made me laugh, and suddenly I had a funny image of drawing cartoon babies lined up in a nursery, with each one having a real raisin glued to the canvas where their belly button should be. I was thinking of giving them a nursery sign labeled, “Raisin Farm” but then I realized people wouldn’t know the back story. Then the fleeting image passed through my mind of my coworkers questioning my mental sanity and placing a phone call to men holding white jackets with buckles on them, convincing me what they were holding was the latest thing in fashion and ushering me into a professionally driven vehicle with no windows in it to the nearest facility for evaluation.

In the end I wound up settling on the idea of “Mac & Cheese” two best friends in a cartoon polaroid taken on a road trip through Missouri. It wasn’t the best idea, but at least it wouldn’t be an idea that would land me in an asylum with missed days of work and would spare me the scared looks on my coworkers’ faces.

What crazy ideas have you had for a project that you’ve censored yourself on? Did you censor yourself because you were afraid of what people might think or because you knew it wouldn’t make sense to anyone else?

One Lovely Blog Award


1. I have to complete the five statements below to receive the award:
Include the award logo somewhere in your blog. 

2. Answer these 10 questions, below, for fun if you want to.

3.Nominate blogs you enjoy. 

4.Pay the love forward: Provide your nominee’s link in your post and comment on their blog to let them know they’ve been included and invited to participate. 

5. Pay the love back with gratitude and a link to the blogger(s) who nominated you.  

Thank you to Kd Corner for nominating me for this award!  I encourage readers to stop by Kd’s Corner, she writes from her heart, writes short stories, and writes to inspire others to take note of things in life to be thankful for.

http://kdcorner.wordpress.com/

I must complete the ten Questions below to receive the award:

1. What kind of blogs do you read most? Blogs with a humorous look at life or with an interesting perspective.

2. What is your favorite Ice Cream? Anything with frozen yogurt or low fat topped with chocolate syrup, nerds candy, sprinkles and gummy worms for a garnish.

3. What is your favorite food? Some would say I’m part Goat and part Ninja Turtle…Homemade pizza with artichokes and black olives or any pizza with black olives on it, OR a burger, in any form; with a single slice of pepperjack cheese. Really I’ll eat anything, I love Indian food and Japanese food as well. Edamame. Yeah I think thats it?

4. Do you prefer Boxers or Briefs? Sometimes I prefer to be a brief boxer. Oh thats not what this question was about was it? Boxers are great for pajama bottoms.

The only underwear I prefer.

5. What is your favorite quote? “I like being weird! Being weird is all I’ve got, that and my sweet style!”-Moss from I.T. Crowd. OR “Good people are guided by their honesty.”-from a fortune I found around Thanksgiving in a secret pocket of a hat at work that looked like a Turkey. Nobody else saw the pocket, I investigated and there it was!

This is Moss.

6.Tell us about your most embarrassing moment? This blog will be full of them. Usually it involves getting embarrassed in front of a love interest (often accidentally self inflicted), a wedgie, gastrointestinal issues, or trying to come off looking cool and then being treated to a humbling.

Yes, this is me at 17, and the embarrassing story will be on the blog later!

7.What do you prefer, dogs or cats?  Everything! However I have a cat named Gizmo who likes to stick her face in the air conditioning vents and wiggle her face around…she has no problem amusing herself. She also likes to sit and see what I’m writing on the computer or drawing at my table.

8. Besides writing what is your favorite thing to do? Talking with other writers and reading what they have to say, draw, paint, boxing and kickboxing, create, dance, sing and make funny voices and impressions of people. Oh and make up words to already existing songs…most renditions are food based.

9. Dark Chocolate or Milk Chocolate? Yes please!

10. What is the best invention you have ever seen?  The wheel. It got us to where we’re going didn’t it?

Now Nominate others… (Quite frankly there were so many of you I wanted to nominate!)

Someone who describes their life and their family in a loving way, she’s new and she deserves it!
www.theselfloathingnarcissist.wordpress.com

For a good laugh read…
www.shutupdad.wordpress.com

An inspiration to women everywhere…
www.thewishfactor.wordpress.com

For an interesting take…
www.thehandwrittenlife.wordpress.com

For insane scenarios and witty banter…
www.idiotprufs.com

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